


The Price of Pride

by SakeBottle



Category: Ookami to Koushinryou | Spice and Wolf
Genre: F/M, Omorashi, Urination
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-14
Updated: 2019-05-14
Packaged: 2020-03-09 09:46:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,550
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18914464
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SakeBottle/pseuds/SakeBottle
Summary: Faced with the prospect of drinking weaker alcohol to save money, Holo drinks far more than usual in an attempt to get drunk, and refuses to let Lawrence know that she's suffering the consequences.





	The Price of Pride

**Author's Note:**

> Commission for Zenkopan of omorashi.org

                Golden leaves fell from the trees overhead as Holo sat and groomed her tail in the back of her merchant companion’s cart. She was quiet, intently focused on the task at hand – her coat was to be perfect, after all, she couldn’t neglect something so important. And as the ears atop her head twitched to protect it from falling leaves, another important sensation grabbed her attention. It had been some time since they’d left some town with a name Holo couldn’t be bothered to remember, and much of that time had been well-spent poking fun at Lawrence – even if by now he was well aware of her little games. Her ears twitched again, this time with mild annoyance. She had to drink something.

                Yawning, Holo stood up as well as anyone could in a moving cart and stretched out her whole body, her tail positioned just right to brush up against Lawrence as she did – though he didn’t give an audible response, she knew without looking at him that his face had gone red. Then she dove in amongst the utterly mundane wares and what few supplies were left with them, making sure to stow away her comb on the way. Lawrence be angry if she were to lose something so expensive,  but more importantly it was very pretty and very useful, and she wasn’t keen on needing to use her hands to brush her tail again.

                But even more important – critical, even – was what Holo was just now getting to sorting through. Alcohol. High-grade, quality stuff, to make living for millennia just a touch more interesting.  And fortunately there was quite a bit of it here, enough to last even Holo a good week or so. She did at least have to check what it was, specifically, and there was one fool-proof way to do just that. Holo grabbed a bottle of drink, tore it open, and…

                … immediately recoiled at the smell. Then immediately went back to try it again – perhaps she’d been wrong? A Wise Wolf was allowed to be wrong from time to time, after all… But, no, it was just as disappointing the second time, and Holo’s ears fell flat against her head as she looked over at Lawrence.

                “Lawrence, you purchased high-quality alcohol, did you not? Unless my nose is defective, this is not high-quality.”

                The merchant’s response was to look over his shoulder for a moment while he spoke. “No, your nose is right. It _was_ quite good when I purchased it, but I’ve diluted it.”

                Holo’s jaw practically fell to the floor, and her voice was that of someone who had just been betrayed by their closest confidant. “Diluted? How could you do such a thing?” She stood up and tried to look angry, but the movement of the wagon forced her to sit down again. “Hmph.”

                “Well, for one, it means I can buy less of it and still have plenty, and most of the money I spend on you already goes towards getting you drunk…” Lawrence coughed as if he could feel Holo’s eyes drilling a hole in the back of his head. “On top of that, alcohol makes you feel warm, but it doesn’t actually warm you up, so drinking too much gets dangerous as we head north and winter gets closer.” One of his hands moved to stroke what little of a beard he had. “But I am also concerned with making sure we have enough to last between towns, and the farther north we go the longer that distance becomes…”

                Holo’s ears twitched for a moment, then she turned back to the stock of alcohol with her tail swishing playfully. “You failed to take into account,” she said, “that if the alcohol is weaker I will just need to drink more of it.” She picked up a mass of bottles, cradling them in her arms as she clambered over to the front seat. “This will be sufficient, I think.”

                “Sufficient?” Lawrence looked over at Holo and raised an eyebrow as she tore open one bottle and downed half of its contents, leaving the rest that she had grabbed on the seat next to her or at her feet. “You have half of what I bought at the last town. You’re not expecting to drink all of it, are you?”

                Holo swung her bottle around and gasped for air in an exaggerated motion. “I would not have to if it were pure. But even so, remember that I told you I could drink an entire lake if I wanted to, so I can and will drink all of it, and if I am not drunk by the end of it, it will be your fault.”

                “You could drink a whole lake, but then you would have to find a way to deal with the consequences,” the merchant said. “It is going to take us a few more hours to get to this next town, and I hadn’t planned on stopping before we get there. That means you are going to be in a lot of trouble if you don’t watch your drinking.”

                Holo had a strange look on her face, like she hadn’t been expecting that sort of comment. But then she shook her head, took another swig of her drink, and leaned in far closer to Lawrence than was appropriate for mere business partners. “Do not concern yourself with that,” she said. “You speak as if I were a child. But I do not need you to tell me my limits. I am the Wise Wolf, after all, and I have been doing this longer than you have been alive.” ~~~~

Lawrence just sighed in response. “Alright, but just remember it will be _your_ fault when you start begging me to stop so you can run off.”

                “So you say.”

* * *

                 True enough, several hours later the two had arrived at an inn and left Lawrence’s horse and cart with the stablehands. Holo had stopped drinking a while ago, having proven her point to her satisfaction… whatever that point was supposed to be. She couldn’t quite remember what exactly she was trying to accomplish, other than getting drunk. And that didn’t even work, as she’d managed to sober up far too quickly for her liking. It probably had something to do with what Lawrence had said, come to think of it – she hadn’t forgotten, and though she’d of course never admit it, he was right. With all the empty bottles she’d left behind, it was inevitable, but after a quick nap and with a clear head she realized the pressure that had built up over all that time was greater than she’d expected.

                Nothing she couldn’t handle, though. For now. As she and Lawrence walked into the inn she reassured herself that she only had to wait a little while longer, though she couldn’t help shifting around beneath her cloak. After pausing for a moment to collect herself, Holo found herself a seat at an empty table, tightly crossed her legs, and draped her tail over them. Hopefully nobody would see what she was doing under the table, but even if someone did see her subtle bouncing they’d no doubt attribute it instead to her impatiently awaiting food.

                That wouldn’t even be that far from the truth. After all, going however-many hours on just an unreasonable amount of what was little more than water meant Holo would gladly convince her bladder to wait a little while longer so she could eat.

                Oh, but of course that would mean more drinking as well. And while the prospect of getting properly drunk was quite appealing, the effects that would have on this delicate human form were cause for concern. Holo tried to reassure herself that this concern was for the fact that this body was a bit of a lightweight, and not what the results of adding more liquids of any kind to it would be – and now that she was thinking about that she very quickly realized she didn’t _want_ to think about it. She gave a little annoyed huff and swapped her legs’ positions. Just a bit longer…

                Food would have been a most welcome distraction, but alas, Holo had none. And, in fact, this situation was only making it painfully apparent how long it actually took to prepare the amount of food necessary to satisfy her gluttony. Not to mention the significant amount of whatever coin was popular around here it would cost to _buy_ the food; if she had to earn all the money spent on her anyways, she’d really rather not add the price of proper laundry or new clothes to that. These weren’t exactly cheap to begin with, after all. And, sure, by now she knew how to set up financial schemes to cover her expenses and then some, but she still didn’t want to make Lawrence have to pay for something like wet clothes. Not that it would come to that in the first place, or anything, but still…

                Holo snuck a hand between her legs, hopefully keeping its purpose there hidden behind her cloak and the table. The extra pressure was helpful, but not for long. After only a few seconds, the hand was withdrawn and Holo forced herself to sit still and upright – and tried to force her tail to behave and say where she’d put it. Even with the threat of growing pressure within her already, Holo couldn’t help but get a bit excited at the sight of the fully-loaded tray in Lawrence’s hands as he approached. Or perhaps it was _because_ of that pressure, considering the arrival of food meant she’d soon be able to take care of herself and get some proper rest.

                ‘ _But I am getting ahead of myself…_ ’ Her body had taken “soon” to mean “now”, so Holo had to put on a straight face and squeeze her legs together even tighter as she felt a little drop of warmth somewhere it was most unwelcome. Barely anything at all, but… ‘ _’tis like a drop in the ocean,_ ’ she thought as a warning to herself.

                Fortunately, the loss of control was momentary, and for now Holo had everything locked up well enough – though, how long would that last if she weren’t focused on it? She wasn’t all that willing to find out, and didn’t pay much attention to the things being said across the table as she started grabbing things to eat. Something about their plans for this town; nothing she couldn’t figure out when she didn’t have more pressing concerns.

                The logical side of Holo wanted her to wrap things up as quickly as possible and deal with the problems her more primal side was presenting – but those same primal instincts were also telling her that she was starving and should eat everything she could get her hands on. Tempting as that was, she had to focus on what she was doing at least a little bit, to keep things under control for as long as possible. So Holo ate slowly, paying close attention to what her body was doing and what she didn’t want it to do; though ironically she was ignoring what _it_ didn’t want _her_ to do, gradually emptying a cup of the local wine into herself. She knew better, of course, but she’d need to drink anyways and it was the first proper alcohol she’d had all day. Her bladder could handle a bit more if she forced it to, even if she’d regret doing so.

                She zoned out even more from the one-sided conversation happening at the table, her only contributions being vaguely-affirmative noises while she directed her energy to more important matters. Just a bit longer…

                “Holo? Are you still listening?”

                Alas, Holo’s attention was drawn back to reality when she heard her name from across the table – thankfully her hood kept her ears hidden as they perked up instinctively. She tried not to look surprised, though her eyes betrayed her while she tried to come up with a response.

                But the follow-up question came too quickly for that to matter. “Are you feeling well? Normally you would be asking me to get you more food by now.” Lawrence was looking straight into her eyes, and his own eyes and the tone of his voice made clear that he was genuinely worried for her.

                Holo nodded and set her knife down. She was perfectly healthy, and not even a bit drunk yet, but… this could be an opportunity for her to get somewhere she could take care of herself. “Yes, I am fine. However…” She interrupted her own speech with a fake yawn that was hopefully convincing enough. “I am rather tired, and I think I would like to lie down now.”

                “Oh, of course.” Lawrence fished a crude key out of his coat and offed it to Holo. “Here. We have the first room on the right just upstairs." She stood, crossed her legs, and took the key, then he spoke again. “I suppose I will finish here… unless you would prefer if I came with you?”

                Holo’s face immediately turned red and for a moment she couldn’t keep her tail still. She wasn’t entirely opposed to the idea, and with her history of immodesty privacy wasn’t as big of a concern as merely being able to relieve herself somewhere. But even so, she couldn’t exactly bring him with her and have him find out that she only wanted to get away from dinner because her bladder was doing exactly what he said it would. “That will not be necessary,” she said, shifting her feet a little and hoping her cloak was in the way. “I can find the room perfectly well on my own.” She let out an indignant huff and made a show of storming off to the stairs.

                She dropped the act as soon as she was out of sight, though, with her free hand immediately finding its way between her legs and refusing to be moved. Just a bit longer… A little bit longer, and a painful trek up a flight of stairs, and it’d be over. Sure, Holo could wait longer still if she needed to, but she was already uncomfortable, just a little bit wet, and already walking into the room where she could keep herself from getting any more wet and uncomfortable.

                The first thing Holo did once she was in the room with the door shut behind her was toss her cloak over to a bed she’d picked at random. Then, she walked over to that bed, stopped just before it, and lowered herself to look under it.

                Her tail, which had been swishing about since she’d thrown off her cloak, immediately froze and fell limp. Holo reached under the bed with a hand, groping around for the thing she needed, repositioning herself a little to get a clear look at what she was grabbing at. Her bladder didn’t much like the new position, and she just barely managed to fight off a leak, but that didn’t change her situation.

                Holo knew enough about human lodging customs by now to know that this was not right at all – there was nothing under her bed, and a similar inspection of the other revealed the same thing. And if this place didn’t provide such basic necessities as deep iron pots, what were patrons meant to do about their needs? More importantly, what was _Holo_ supposed to do now?

                She stood up straight and did a little dance, her hand going right back between her legs after having briefly been used to help her change positions. There wasn’t anything else in the room that would have been helpful, just a little wooden bowl on a table in the corner, and that certainly wasn’t an option. Perhaps one of the other rooms would have a solution? After all, modern human structures were always built so that their upper floors were larger than the lower ones, and this inn was quite modern. Combined with how humans seemed to just throw trash anywhere they could, it followed that they might also use the overhanging parts of a building for a similar purpose.

                Holo groaned as she put her cloak back on and left the room behind. She didn’t even know if what she was thinking of was a real thing – if it were, it’d probably just amount to a hole in a floor, but that was all she needed right now. And surely one of these rooms would have such a thing. Holo was trying all the doors, and they were all locked. If there were anyone to see, she was certain she’d look ridiculous, pushing and pulling door handles to no avail with a hand stuck between her legs.

                And when she finally did find a door that opened, about halfway down the hall, it was just a closet stocked with cleaning supplies and bedsheets. Admittedly, that bucket was looking rather tempting, but that was certainly beneath her. There had to be a better option somewhere. So Holo reluctantly left the closet behind and resumed her search.

                She didn’t find much of anything, every door she tried turning out to be locked – by the time she reached the far end of the hall, she wasn’t expecting anything different from the last couple of doors. One of them, however, looked as if it might be what she was looking for. A door to a room that would have been tucked into a far corner of the inn, with a little sign on it indicating that the room behind the door was indeed what Holo needed.

                Her ears perked up and her tail wagged ever so slightly beneath her cloak at the sight. Holo approached the door, leaning into it to push it open with her shoulder. But it didn’t open. She tried again, this time with a little more force, but again nothing happened. She stepped back and looked at the sign on the door, her head tipped slightly to the side and her legs pressing closer in response to the little splash of new warmth between them. The hand there tightened its grip, hoping to keep things under control for long enough to figure out what was happening here. Sure, Holo could wait longer still if she had to – the momentary loss of control, she assured herself, was only because she’d gotten a little too excited that her search had finished – but it would be better if she didn’t have to.

                Holo stepped forward again and knocked on the door with her free hand. Perhaps someone was already there, and the door was barred for the moment. But she couldn’t hear anything happening inside and didn’t get any response. So it must have been locked. And Holo _did_ have a key on her. She knew it was probably just a waste of time, but even so she procured her room key from the depths of her cloak and tried it on the door. As expected, it didn’t fit, and Holo couldn’t stop herself from letting out a little defeated whine.

                She’d have to just go back to the room and wait for Lawrence to arrive with the key – or go back downstairs and get it herself, but by now she wasn’t anywhere near presentable enough to be seen in public, and in any case still refused to let Lawrence know he was right about this. She still wasn’t quite sure what she was trying to accomplish, but she’d already come this far with it, and she’d have to see it through to the end. At the very least, she might as well try to get some rest if that was at all possible, since that was what she _said_ she was going to do. It’d just be a little longer, anyways. She could handle that.

                Even so, it would be tough. Manageable, if just barely so, but tough. Holo didn’t even drink that much at dinner just now, but even so it still felt like that was already catching up with everything from earlier. Perhaps it was because she’d finally had some proper alcohol, and even if it hadn’t been enough to get more than a little buzz from it was certainly enough to get things moving.

                Best not to think about that, though. Holo groaned and tried to push such thoughts from her mind, and replace them with… anything else, really. Fortunately, it worked long enough for her to shuffle back to her room, her tail bristling under her cloak the whole way. She didn’t bother taking the cloak off when she got there, instead just collapsing onto the nearest bed, careful not to fall face-first and apply extra weight where it didn’t need to be applied.

                Holo moved around constantly, trying to find a comfortable position on the bed, but as she crossed and uncrossed her legs and leaned this way and that, nothing seemed to be of much help anymore. Instead she settled for lying on her back, legs together with a hand immutably between them, and bent so that her knees were in the air while her feet touched the bed. Her legs shook incessantly while her free hand grabbed at the pouch of grain around her neck – she didn’t plan on _using_ it, though. There was no way she could do that here or in this state anyways, as much as her true form’s larger size and therefore larger bladder would have helped. But she could still use it as a much-needed distraction. It would give her something to focus her thoughts on. Normally she’d be thinking of home, but…

                Well, at least she could think about her travels to places far away from home. Places she’d been, places she’d go to later. Places where she and Lawrence had made a lot of money and places where they’d lost a lot of money, and yet more places they _could_ make money. And that money sure would be useful for buying all the fancy new things she’d hear about and immediately want – and of course she’d inevitably end up having whatever it was she wanted despite Lawrence’s repeated insistence that they not waste money like that.

                Of course, no amount of money, no matter whose face was on it or how many different names it was called, could buy the thing she most wanted right now. Surely she’d only need to wait a little bit longer, right? She could do that, couldn’t she? Holo wasn’t quite so sure about that anymore, though so far her wiggling around had stopped anything worse than a few little drops from escaping her. Those little drops weren’t even helping anyways – every so often she’d feel a bit warmer for a little bit, but it was never enough to ease the pressure. And that pressure was starting to get to her, mess with her head. If there was anything she could do about her situation, she couldn’t imagine how it would be done, unless she planned on disrobing and just soaking the bed outright just to be done with it. Perhaps there was _one_ other thing, but even now she had too much pride and self-respect to subject herself to that – and most unfortunately she was in no state to appreciate the irony of how at the same time she thought it perfectly acceptable to openly hold herself and squirm around like a human child. And, well, if she was already doing that, why not just go for it? Not like it would be any worse than wetting herself and a bed she didn’t own.

                Holo debated with herself for a short while if she should just go to the place she knew she’d be able to take care of her problem or stay in bed and wait until she had an opportunity to do something more appropriate. Her basic instincts won that battle, and she was just gathering up the strength to get out of bed when the door to the room opened. Holo’s plans to get up slowly and carefully were immediately thrown out the window and she practically jumped into an upright sitting position, the sudden movement adding a significant amount of warmth to her underwear.

                For what felt like an eternity, Holo stared at Lawrence with both her hands jammed between her legs under her cloak. Neither of them spoke, but her heavy breathing and the look in her eyes said more than enough about her present condition. She forced herself to stand and pull a hand from between her legs, breaking eye contact and trying to look professional as she grabbed the key and slinked out into the hall.

                She didn’t look back – there was nothing to look back _at_. Whatever Lawrence was doing or thinking right now didn’t matter. Only one thing did, and that was ahead of her. Holo had her eyes glued to the end of the hall as she marched forward with as much conviction as she could pull together in this state – which, of course, was only enough to keep her standing barely upright with a hand between her legs hoping that the warmth there didn’t spread.

                Holo had crossed the majority of the hall before she froze. She was _right there_ , only a few more steps and she’d be at the door that led to her salvation – but someone else got to it first. Someone came out of the room across the hall and crossed straight in front of Holo, entering the room that was rightfully hers. Her legs suddenly felt weak, and she stumbled over to press her back against the nearest wall. The hand she’d been eagerly carrying the key in was promptly shoved between her legs, which were now incessantly shuffling around. Her eyes were watering as she found herself suddenly thrust into a fight to keep waiting _just a bit longer_ , when she’d come so close. Now she had to convince her body that it wouldn’t be getting the relief it had expected to have by now. What other choice did she have but to pull herself together and just _wait_? Even if there were alternatives, all her energy was dedicated to not wetting herself in the hallway and she’d never think of anything.

                Knowing that didn’t make her situation any better. She still had to get through however long she’d be expected to stand there, and that was looking less realistic by the second. There was an ocean within the Wise Wolf, and it wanted out immediately. Nothing she did could help the feeling that at any moment she could lose it all – and being able to hear what was going on in the room _she_ should have been in wasn’t helping one bit. It sounded like whoever was in there had been waiting a good while, and that just made Holo wish she were in their position.

                But she wasn’t. She was stuck leaning against a wall with her hands practically clawing at her most delicate area in the hopes of keeping things under control for just a little bit longer. But did she even _have_ a little bit longer? Holo’s eyes went wide, her tail bristled, and she couldn’t help but gasp when she realized: she didn’t. A new splash of warmth, larger than before, had entered the equation and this time she could feel the liquid in her hands, and she knew that the rest wasn’t far behind. She was out of time, and if she didn’t find _something_ to help her immediately, she was done for.

                She looked around in a panic, hoping against all logic that there would be something in the hallway. But she knew there was nothing, she knew it would be better to just give up now and surrender to the inevitable. Unless…

                There was one option, and Holo didn’t even think about it before she shot across the hall and practically broke down the door she’d earlier identified as leading to a closet. She didn’t waste time closing it properly, instead facing away from it so her cloak would hide her. Her trembling hands struggled with the lacing keeping her pants together while another, final burst of her waters threatened to break free. And it did, but Holo was ready with no time to spare. Her pants and thoroughly-damp underwear were out of the way and she was positioned over the ever-so-convenient bucket on the floor of the closet by the time she lost control. Some no doubt hit the floor instead of the bucket at first, but soon enough the only sounds were of her own heavy breathing and the torrent beneath her striking wood, and that sound quickly became drowned out by the sound of liquid against liquid.

                Holo let out an involuntary groan while her tail wagged beneath her cloak. Hopefully beneath the cloak, anyways – even in such overwhelming bliss she was still worried that she might be seen, not because of what she was doing but because of what she _was_. She tried not to worry about that, though, and convinced herself to instead be taken by the feeling of relief. However long it had been, however much she’d had to drink, none of that mattered anymore – it was all literally beneath her now, even if it wasn’t exactly her preferred means of disposing of all that.

                She’d made it, dry enough that her pants would likely be fine after just being aired out for a bit. Below them, though, was something that would take a lot more work to wash. They’d been just about ruined, but saved her pants from that same fate. Once Holo was able to think clearly again she found some humor in that – normally she would wear nothing under her pants, but she’d decided to try out doing so today because the little article was cheap and apparently becoming traditional. She’d doubted that they’d be worth wearing at all, but wore them anyways, and that decision had saved her from being in a lot of trouble – perhaps they were a good idea after all.

                It must have been a minute, maybe two, before her stream finally tapered off and Holo was left waiting for the last drops to leave her. When she was satisfied, she pulled her clothes back up, immediately regretting the decision when the cold and wet fabric touched her, but she forced herself to accept it. She stepped back and looked down at what she’d done – there was a little splash just below her now where she’d failed to get herself entirely over the bucket in time, but that didn’t mean the bucket itself had survived unscathed. It wasn’t all that small, and the generous spray it had received looked like it had stained the wood on the bucket’s interior, having hit the side before falling down to create a little pool in there. And, honestly, that little pool was a bit surprising in itself, if only because of how little of the space in the bucket it took up. It wasn’t even filled halfway, though Holo was sure she’d have overflowed it. She’d boasted that she could drink an entire lake, and it certainly felt like she’d released at least that much. Either way, that bucket was someone else’s problem now, so with a sigh she backed out of the closet and turned to head over to the room where she could go to sleep like she’d said she would.

                Except, as soon as she turned around she found Lawrence directly in front of her. Her cheeks were red and there was a look of surprise in her eyes as she looked up into his, but that was quickly replaced by her standard mock-anger when she spoke before he got a chance.

                “I believe you owe me an apology,” she said, as if it were fact.

                “ _I_ owe _you_ an apology? What did I do?” Lawrence seemed a little taken aback, but not totally surprised – he’d come to expect something like this by now, after all.

                “Well,” Holo said, getting into Lawrence’s face while she bushed out her tail. She sounded more annoyed than anything. “Everything that happened just now was _your_ fault, for if _you_ had brought standard alcohol, I would not have needed to drink as much, and never would have ended up in… that situation.”

                “I explained to you why I diluted the alcohol and I clearly recall warning you not to drink so much. You did this to yourself.”

                “Perhaps.” Holo said, crossing her arms with a huff. “But even after all that I still did not become drunk today. You ought to apologize for that, at least.”

                Lawrence brought a hand to his forehead. “Fine. What do you want me to do?”

                Holo twitched her tail playfully in response. “You can apologize by buying me those pickled peaches like you promised you would.”

                The response was a groan. “You are _never_ going to let me forget that, are you?”

                “I will,” Holo said, her tail now wagging full-force while she clasped her hands in front of her, shut her eyes, and cocked her head in an attempt to look cute. “As soon as I have them.”

 


End file.
